HEARTBROKEN

I received the worst news in the most amazingly written email this week.  I've volunteered with this person for the past five years.  We have butted heads many times yet remain friends.  They had the long lasting cough that started in Sept/Oct (and led to walking pneumonia for several of us).  They resist going to doctors even though they heard that many were getting the 5 day antibiotic regime.  I don't know when she did visit her Dr but other the past month she went to many doctors.  Here is the outcome:

Dear Friends and Family,

You’re receiving this letter because my life is more joyful as you are or have been in it and for that I’m very grateful.

Unfortunately, I have some challenging news, and although it would be best, I don’t have the capacity to speak to each of you or keep you updated.  Talking can sometimes exacerbate my cough.  So please see this email as me reaching out to you with love and gratitude and asking you not to feel sorry for me, nor call me asking questions or to get updates.  I will send updates when there is anything of significance, but other than that I simply want to continue to share joy with you as I am able and be grateful for the blessings I have. 

I’ve recently been diagnosed with lung cancer.  The prognosis without treatment is 4 – 6 months.  The good news is there is a targeted treatment for my specific type of cancer.   The  additional good news is that if all goes as scheduled I will start my treatment this Friday (yesterday).   It, the treatment, is a pill with generally less side effects than chemotherapy.  If it works it can extend my life expectancy to a year, or two, and in rare occasions it has extended life for five years.

Until I have a couple weeks on the treatment my days may be challenging and though you are special to me, the best way to communicate is by email or text and I will do my best to respond.

For those concerned about my Volunteer responsibilities, I have and will continue to work closely with (Chair) to make sure everything is covered and any training that needs to happen is taken care of.   Hopefully my follow-thru will be back to normal soon.

For those of you involved in my end-of-life plans I have already spoken to my financial advisor and written to my attorney.  I’m re-doing some of my plans to make it easier for you.  There are some advantages to having a guestimate of your end date.

All my love. 

SNOW DAYS!

Happy Belated Valentines Day.

I kept the boys company so the parents could enjoy a night away.  Granted, it was just the Guest Suite here on complex grounds.  But it was special for them.  Good thing it was walkable as we got a major snowstorm on Thursday with more falling on Friday.  The sidewalks were all cleared by neighbors, so the short walk was safe and not slippery.

It really is fun when the boys get a snow day!  And then to get TWO snow days followed by a Monday holiday, WOW.  (I was wondering if 💩 would formally cancel it ...)  We have pizza, salad and movies on Friday night and I let the parents know I didn't mind if Braeden's girlfriend came over.  The three under 21's enjoyed their meal in the living room, each person had their own tray on the giant ottoman in front of the sofa.

Do you have a Valentine Tradition?  My sister and hubby make each other a Valentine.  For 35 years!  Here's what he made her this year:

On Thursday Dad took Deacon out sledding for hours.  On Friday Mom took him out sledding.  Good exercise for all!  Deacon made a snow cone using snow.  Braeden walked 4 miles to his girlfriend's house.  I was the only slug in the house.

After pizza, Deacon went to play video games.  I let him have an hour then got out some games for 2 people. So he could interact with humans when under my care.  Every 20 minutes, one of us had a reason to check on the lovebirds.  I had bought treats before the storm so I could offer soft drinks once, cookies once, red licorice, etc., let them know they could buy or rent a movie for the two of them, etc.  

Deacon came into my room and chose a movie for the two of us.  The Green Book.  WoW.  A true story based on a Black pianist (holder of two PhDs) and his white, lower class driver and bodyguard.  We got through half and will finish it today.  He would stop the movie every 15 minutes to ask a deep question.  A wonderful experience for this Gramma.  (He was my spy buddy so I could send also him to check on the others).

Girlfriend left at 11pm and I let the boys stay up til midnight but they both went to sleep before then.  When I was sure they were down, this Gramma lay her head on her pillow!  And had a great night's sleep.

I'm thinking of creating a political meme every week. 

 Good therapy for me!

MAUI MEMORIES

Just tripping down memory lane.  Yesterday was Mr. Ralph's 91st birthday.  Our celebrations are small but memorable.  After our typical Friday night pizza, salad and movie ... the family had Haagen Daaz vanilla ice cream with Hershey's chocolate sauce.  With candles.  We shared a few little memories together and I spent most of my day walking down memory lane.  Just the fun and happy memories.

We were lucky enough to vacation every year in Maui.  Before Kate started school, we would go at the end of January so he could begin his new year in the ocean!  Every year at 8:00 am or 9:00 am, off he went for a swim.

His 75th birthday

Another Maui tradition is to have a photo taken in Lahaina with colorful parrots.  Kate carries on this tradition with her boys (hope they can afford to go again someday!)

Every year, he would want to look at homes or condos to buy.  One year, the price was right and we bought one!  His dream come true.  It was the BEST 950 sq ft house for two people and visitors.  Two bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and a two car garage.

He loved puttering outdoors and Maui is 24/7 365 days a year.  Heaven for sure!  He (and a carpenter) turned our little 6 foot concrete back patio from this 

He put up little tiny white lights on the edges of the patio cover.  Best entertaining location ever.

Best Maui friends

Despite excruciating pain from bone cancer, he did not want to return to Oregon (we have Death with Dignity happily voted in).  Nope.  He did not want to die in the rain.  His last week was in a hospital bed in the dining room looking out on his fabulous deck.

 

MOUTH CANCER

This is an update to last week's Worry Wart blog about the roof of my mouth.

When I called on Tuesday to get an appointment with an ENT (referred by my dentist who noticed a hematoma on the roof of my mouth) the soonest they could fit me in was the end of March.  So I could enjoy more weeks of worry.  Fortunately for me, the next morning I got a call about a cancellation for Friday morning at 9:30 am.  YES!!

The doctor (now I have another "ologist" to add to my group, he's an otolaryngologist) did a very thorough ear exam, nose exam and finally my mouth.  He had a great personality (said he was required to follow the letters of his speciality "to the letter" due to his OCD ... Ear Nose Throat).  His opinion?  Most likely a hemangioma, a bruise of sorts.

Wait and see, observe and monitor.  Come back in three months.  He took a photo and will compare.  My dentist also has two photos taken one month apart.  And they will compare all.  Apparently a biopsy of the palate is pretty painful and slow healing and to be avoided if possible (kinda like the podiatrist saying don't get my bunions fixed until I am unable to walk at all!).

Monday I go to physical therapy to learn how to compensate for aging muscles.  My goal is to be able to get down on the floor and then get myself back up.  Alone.  So I don't have to shout "help I've fallen and I can't get up".  Mainly I want to feel comfortable taking myself on a walk.  I seem to totter these days and my posture needs some work.  I saw myself on our Ring camera while reviewing the tape ... and I thought WHO is that old lady?  Me.  Walking a bit hunched over and tottering to our front door.  Time to take some action.  I've got at least 20 more years (if I live through these next four) and no sense looking 90 if I'm not.

 

The Good, The Bad and the WTF!

Sorry I totally forgot to post today until just now.

My reasons (excuses) are many and varied.  I womanned the virtual office three days (instead of two).  I've been playing with my sister and family since she is in town again.  Had a wicked case of IBS (actually missed pizza party with Sis and her fam and my fam). Then endured a face headache that wouldn't quit.

My dentist noticed a spot on the roof of my mouth last month when I came in for something else.  He surmised it was a hematoma probably poked with a food item.  I went back this past week and it has changed for the worse and he referred me to an ENT.

Risk factors (from Mayo Clinic Website) 
    Smoking or using smokeless tobacco

    Heavy alcohol consumption

    Poor dental hygiene

    HPV infection

    Advanced age

Only the last one applies to me

    
So sorry my mind has been elsewhere.  I'm always a worry wart but cancer in the mouth has taken two friends of mine in the past.

More next week.

P.S.  Aging is NOT for sissies

A WICKED WEEK

Maybe I need to be put on anti depression medication.  The week beginning January 5 has hit me hard.

He who shouldn't be named is such an arrogant self centered human and I can't bear to use his name.  I went to the dictionary/thesaurus and now feel much worse.

My spirits just got a little lift when I decided I have an emoji I can use in place of a name

💩

And it rhymes with the name!  OK, I felt better for a moment.  I'm confident I can use the emoji in every medium I use.

Why does 💩 spout his "ideas" that offend most humans?  Invade  Panama Canal and seize the canal?  Buy Greenland?  Banish and remove citizens to dangerous countries who have done us no harm?  Annex Canada?  Wears his badge of FELONY proudly?  Convicted with with no consequences.  Insane. Delusional. Arrogant. Despicable.  Just plain 💩.

On the other hand, the California fires.  Mother Nature has no mercy.  One female suspect has been arrested for arson at the Leo Carrillo State Park fire.  Recent thinking believes the Pacific Palisades fire was caused by faulty power grids.  Saturday morning updates say 39,000 acres are consumed by fire, 11 deaths and taking 12,000 structures.

And now the fire is shifting to the East.

Thankfully, many are pledging funds to help with reconstruction ... which today is estimated at more the 150 BILLION dollars.  Like Lahaina in Maui, it will take ten years or more to rebuild.

Continue with your prayers for America.

WHAT IS GOING ON?

I did make it til midnight.  Upgraded my Prosecco with a bit of pomegranate juice and a raspberry.  The menu was all from the deli of our local gourmet grocery.  Followed by my latest craze, Haagen Dazs coffee ice cream. 

The next day was over the top productive.  I don't know what has gotten in to me!  Cleaning and organizing like a crazed Martha Stewart.

Remember this ...

(We still need to clean the oven racks ...)

We use inexpensive dish cloths instead of paper towels and they were no longer white.  So into the kitchen sink with bleach and water.  I also ordered a new 24 pack and folded and put into our container.  After the old ones were washed and dried, I folded them, found a perfect sized bin and made room in the laundry/cleaning supply/storage room to fit on a shelf.

When I got in there I noticed the washer lid was pretty grimy so cleaned that then went out to the dishwasher and cleaned all around the door.  And the top freezer of our fridge.  (I'm in love with Mr. Clean's rubber gloves)

Kate and I decided to replace our battered kitchen utensils with wooden ones.  Amazon delivered food grade mineral oil.  After cleaning all of our wooden spoons with salt and lemon juice ...

Now to take down Christmas.  So much Christmas!  But Jesse does it all and because he remembers which boxes have which items.  I bought some cedar balls to put in a sealed container with my Christmas bedspread (while in ) (also the boys' snowflake pillow cases)

The family returns Sunday afternoon and then we will be back on the school and sports schedule. I'm seriously considering going on a soup for dinner phase.  My Mom made the best Italian Wedding Soup.  I reached out to my Italian high school buddy for a recipe .... two typewritten pages!  I'm going to do a partial follow with a few time saving cheats.

My New Year's resolution?  Live a joyful life.  What's yours?