(A Grey-Haired Confessional from Someone Who’s Finally Letting Go and Letting it Grow —Sort Of)
For the record, I’m not trying to make a statement. I wasn’t trying to “embrace my truth (or youth)” or “age gracefully” or any of those phrases that sound like compliments but are really just code for “you look older now, but we support you emotionally.”
I was just tired. And cheap.
Tired of sitting in a salon chair every five weeks while a 28-year-old stylist asked me, “Are we still covering the silver today?” like she was performing a mercy killing. Tired of pretending the roots weren’t winning.
So I stopped. I let the grey come in. And let my bob grow longer.
It wasn’t a grand gesture. There was no Instagram reel with a dramatic filter and a voiceover saying “this is me now.” It was more like a slow surrender. And honestly? At first, it was… weird. I used Covid to my advantage.
There’s an awkward in-between phase no one talks about … where you don’t look confidently silver yet, just vaguely unkempt, like someone who forgot about their hair for a while. Strangers assumed I was older, especially since I don’t usually wear makeup any longer. One young guy in the produce section called me “ma’am” with a reverence usually reserved for Civil War re-enactors.
And suddenly, the question wasn’t “Does this hairstyle look good?” It was: “Does this hairstyle make me look old?” Followed immediately by: “...and is that necessarily a bad thing?”
Because let’s be honest—what does “old” even mean anymore? I’ve seen 70-year-olds running marathons (I even know one!) and 30-year-olds who pull out their backs brushing their teeth. If grey hair makes me look old, so be it. I’ve earned old. I’ve survived low-rise jeans, Aqua Net, perms, and a regrettable mullet in 1983. I’m not scared of grey. I’m just trying to figure out what to do with it.
Some days, I want it long enough to pull it into a loose bun and feel like a French art teacher. Other days, I leave it wild and wavy and pretend I’m going for “elegant eccentric.” And sometimes I look in the mirror and wonder if I should just dye it purple and lean into the whole “cool grandma” thing.
But mostly, I’m learning to let my hair be what it is: mine. It’s not trendy. It’s not youthful. It’s not trying to trick anyone into thinking I’m younger than I am.
It’s just honest.
And in a world full of filters, facelifts, and Photoshopped and AI enhancement perfection, maybe honest hair is the boldest look of all.
Honest Hair is always a good look IMO. I got Dreadlocks when I turned 60, I'd always wanted them and the stigma and stereotypes prevented me in my Corporate Lives from doing it. As a Senior, who was now having the complexities of Age thinning and Med related Hair loss, I decided to just finally do it. I've not dyed my Hair but oddly after Dreadlocks it got Darker, who knows Why? And now it's getting Sun Bleached... eventually it should Ombre into Silvering I suppose if I Age long enuf for it to... or not, my Dad never went Grey, still had Blue Black Hair when he Died in his 70's, my Mom got prematurely Silver in her 30's, so, my Brother did too and I tend to be leaning towards Dad's genetics of staying pretty much the Hair Color I always have had. I would think having to Dye Hair would be too much a chore and I'm Lazy, I'm also a Lazy Dreadhead so just keep them Clean and mostly separated, it's the easiest Hairstyle ever and I Love it. I like your results and if you've got a Peace about going Natural, I think that means everything.
ReplyDeleteI am loving the grey/white. Still not sure about the style. Our city just opened a new recreation facility with two pools and I hope to be taking water aerobics ... may need a wash and blow short style soon. Maybe a sassy one!
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