Ode to My Big Toe

There was a time in my life when my big toes had one job: look cute in sandals. They both performed admirably.

Now, at 74, my big toe requires medical supervision, genetic analysis, careful trimming protocols, and a nightly petroleum jelly routine. I did not see this coming.

Apparently, I inherited my mother’s inward curving big toenails.  She passed along many wonderful things: resilience, practicality, a sturdy constitution, a love of cooking. And also, it seems, ambitious nail curvature.

Some kids inherit fine china. I inherited a C-shaped toe strategy.  This week, my podiatrist trimmed just a bit too enthusiastically and nicked the side. One tiny spot of blood. Nothing dramatic. But when you are a Type 2 gal, even a tiny toe injury becomes a committee meeting.

I tried not panic.
I tried to just assess.

An acquaintance with Type 2 got a cut on his foot that refused to heel.  So I am a very Nervous Nelly.  (After six months of doctor appointments and various antibiotics, he had to have his foot amputated).

Max suggested I clean and pat dry and apply petroleum jelly.  Twice a day.  Let nature do its thing first.  If anything changes, I'll be contacting the podiatrist.

You know ~ there is a humility that comes with aging body maintenance. Reading glasses on every surface. Hearing aids I adore. Slip-on shoes that prioritize stability over seduction. A podiatrist on speed dial. These are not signs of decline; they are evidence of attention.

At 30, I bought heels.
At 74, I buy sturdy slip on shoes.

So here I am, petroleum jelly at the ready, grateful for modern podiatry (most of the time), wide-toed shoes, and a body that, with a little supervision, still carries me exactly where I want to go.  Youth is about enhancement. Aging is about maintenance.

I need to remind him that I prefer nails trimmed straight across.  

Concessions in Aging

Somehow, I crossed an invisible line.

Not all at once. Oh no. Aging is sneaky. It comes in small, reasonable, perfectly logical concessions. One at a time. Each one totally justified.

And suddenly you look around and realize you’ve built an entire lifestyle out of them.  Let’s review ...

Reading Glasses

I used to think people who wore reading glasses on a chain were… well… committed to the “look”.

Now I own three pairs, although not on chains (yet)

One in the kitchen

One in my purse

One in the car

One on my head at all times

Comfy Clothes

Once upon a time, I had “outfits.”  Business suits, night on the town ensembles, meeting friends for Happy Hour.

Now I have:

Soft pants
Softer pants
And “fancy” soft pants

If an item of clothing has a zipper, it had better be attached to a coat.

Bathroom Accessories

At some point, the phrase “toilet arms” entered my vocabulary.  Grab bars are great but let me tell you, toilet safety supports are magnificent.  Like a personal trainer… for standing up.

A Podiatrist

There was a time when I could:

See my feet

Reach my feet

Deal with my feet

Now I have a professional on retainer.  And because I have Diabetes, it’s half the cost I used to pay for a pedicure.  He trims. He files. He burrs the callouses.  He chats.  Every six weeks it’s practically a spa day, minus the cucumber water.  He even does a lotion foot rub!

Prescriptions and OTC Royalty

I have prescriptions. Eight or nine actually.  (So my semi annual blood work results are always spot on).

But then there is my over-the-counter empire.

If there is a symptom, I have a remedy:

Dry eyes? Got drops.

Red eyes?  Got drops.

Allergies?  Zyrtec to the ready.

Dry mouth? Got Biotene lozenges and holistic drops to add to my water (from my fabulous dentist)

Mystery ache? I have aspirin, Aleve, Tylenol and Motrin.

Bandaids of all sizes, blister gel pads, medical wrap  … even an eye wash cup and a patch.

My medicine container is more like a small pharmacy.

Slip-On Shoes

I used to tie laces.  I used to wear heals.  I loved all kinds of shoes (not like Emelda)  Now I glide.

Enter my stylish slip-on Kiziks.
No bending. No tugging. No muttering.

Just step in and go. Like a grown-up version of toddler shoes, but cuter and more expensive.  And no velcro.

The Nighttime Uniform

Nightgown.
Slippers (since the Lego days). (I even have indoor only Kiziks these days)
Magic fingers in my bed.

I have an adjustable bed and three levels of vibration.  I often use this to get back to sleep after that 3am visit to the ladies room.

My New Philosophy

Here’s the thing about all these “concessions” ...  Every single one makes life easier.

• I can read menus.
• I can safely take a shower
• I can hear conversations.
• I don’t have to wrestle with shoes.
• I don’t dread standing up from the toilet.

These aren’t defeats.  They’re upgrades.

You reach a certain age and realize:  Comfort beats vanity.  Convenience beats stubbornness. And dignity sometimes comes in a discreet, well-designed package.

If that means I am the Queen of OTC remedies, wearing slip-on shoes, bladder protection, sipping water with dental drops in it…

So be it.

Long live the Queen.

HELP ME!

Now that my hair is long enough (again) to tie it back, I'm wondering if I should go short again.  I didn't like having short hair when my face was fat ... but in the past two years I've lost a bit blubber.

What do you think?  Short or medium?  Curly or straight?  Tied up or back?

 

Where it all began

1999

2000

           2010

2020

2022

   March 2024 (hairband keeping it out of my face)

December 2024 (salon cut and styled)

Current

 

MOST POPULAR

Potato Chips 

The Greatest Snack Love Story Ever Fried

I have never had a sweet tooth.  Even as a child.  I would get small bags of potato chips in my Easter basket and a large wrapped bag at Christmas.  My niece had individually chosen table favors at her wedding and ... I got potato chips!  I eat potato chips almost every day.

The most-told origin story puts potato chips in Saratoga Springs, New York, in 1853, at a restaurant called Moon’s Lake House. They were supposedly created by chef George “Crum” Speck, possibly in response to a picky customer complaining that his potatoes were too thick.

Footnote: historians say the story is a bit fuzzy and recipes for thin fried potatoes existed earlier—but Saratoga “chips” are definitely where the legend (and popularity explosion) took off.

In the U.S., potato chips are the largest category in salty snacks, reaching about $8.6 billion in sales recently, and staying #1 even as people flirt with pretzels and tortilla chips.

Globally, it’s harder to claim the #1 snack on Earth (the world snacks category includes cookies, candy, instant noodles, etc.), BUT potato chips are clearly one of the biggest global snack giants—huge market, huge cultural presence, and massive international flavor variations.

Did you ever wonder which flavors are most popular (puh leeze, not dill pickle). here and in other countries?  When I traveled with Mr. Ralph, while he was working, I would visit shops and buy a bag of what the clerk would tell me was the most chosen flavor.  Here's what I learned (I'm odd ... I would also visit local McDonald's and see what local items they served.  Same with Starbucks.  And YES both of these were abundant in any country I've visited.

🇺🇸 USA

The most common flavor in USA overall: Classic / Original salted.  Then BBQ, Sour Cream & Onion, Salt & Vinegar

Birthday gifts from the Grands

🏴 England (UK)

Most common “default”: Ready Salted (plain salted)
Also extremely common: Salt & Vinegar, Cheese & Onion (UK "crisp" culture is basically an Olympic sport.)

🇩🇪 Germany

Most common: Paprika is famously huge!
Also: salted, sour cream/herbs, “spicier/drier” BBQ styles

🇦🇹 Austria

Very similar to Germany: Paprika and salted dominate
(Also: “sour cream” styles are everywhere in that region.)

🇮🇹 Italy

Most common: Salted  Very common “Italian classic”: Rosemary and olive-oil flavored chips show up a lot too

🇨🇳 China

Most common mainstream flavors often include: Original, Cucumber, Tomato, Spicy varieties
(Asian chip aisles are where flavor gets creative fast.)

🇦🇷 Argentina

Most common: Salted and Paprika-style flavors
Often you’ll see: “Jamón” (ham) BBQ-style flavors (Barbacoa) Mustard flavor, tomato and o nion.


🌺 Hawaii

Most common everywhere in Hawaii is still Classic salted  But the most Hawaii-famous flavor is: Maui Onion (an icon—if you know, you KNOW)(And I still buy them occasionally on the mainland)

There’s even a potato chip song in my personal mythology. My sister sent it to me years ago — slow, folksy, sung by a man who sounded like he’d seen some things. I only remember one line about chips and lips, which, honestly, is the perfect summary of my relationship with potato chips anyway.  By Slim Gaillard in 1953 (I'm pretty sure it was dedicated to ME as I was born in 1952)

https://youtu.be/NFpztcGHAog?si=M6zgDey9Fd5f03vU

Some people want sweets or ice cream when life gets hard.  I want salt, crunch, and the comforting certainty that I can eat the whole bag and still feel absolutely correct about it.

At this age, if you find something that brings you joy, doesn’t require a password reset, and comes in a bag with built-in portion denial … you hold onto it.

Potato chips aren’t a snack. They’re a mood. They’re crunchy therapy.  They’re the reason I can tolerate email.

P.S.  My sister sent me a tin of Bonilla a la Vista Olive Oil potato chips from Spain for my birthday last year.